When I was tol I need to blog, my thought was, what do I have to say and who would want to hear or read it should I say. Then it happened again, not to m, but one of my clients. It is the number one complaint of most host…”People do not RSVP anymore”. Everytime I hear this out of a host, the thought crosses my mind…if 90 percent of the people are saying it…it must mean that even some of my host are guilty, even myself. Why do we not RSVP anymore? Some reasons I came up with may be valid and some not so valid. I think one of the main reasons when we are talking “kids parties” is… some mom’s are dealing with one or more kids involved in different activities and possibly both parents are juggling the work schedule and the kids schedule and truly don’t know if they will be able to get the kids to the event; at least until it get closer to the actual date it’s very hard for them to commit. The second reason I believe has to do with the economy, some families are really struggling these days and they truly would love for their child to attend but the feel the pressure of bringing a gift that they really can’t afford. The third is I believe the last of valid reasons, the family is possible dealing with a unforseeable future, meaning their dealing with sickness, family strains, such as they may be a caregiver to family member, or they may have a job where they are on call and such. All of that considered and even though I could list a bunch of other reasons people may give for not letting a host know whether or not they will attend, I just couldn’t justify the ones I thought of. So without pointing out too many negatives, I will just give a couple of examples and move on. One main invalid reason is: 1. We may have something or someplace better to be (ouch). Sad but true, maybe there is a friend/relative we are waiting to see if their event will fall on same day etc… But may I quote my Grandmother… ” If someone is asking you if you will be attending a function the proper manners are “Yes or No” the day you receive invite, but if you don’t know if you are able to attend you should pick up phone (now days text/email may be ok) to let host know your reason for your “Maybe”, such as “Heather we are expecting my husband’s parents for a visit at about that same time frame, would it be ok if I get back with you when I know when they will arrive for sure?” “Maybe’s” need to be a true “not sure” if we can make it happen, and should come with communication to your host. So to combat some of the valid reasons, you may need to make a decision within the first 3 days, ediquette specialist say you should respond as soon as you receive invite, it shows your excitement and enthusiasm to attend event. But if you truly don’t know what to do, figure it out quickly, respond with a yes or a no if at all possible, “maybe’s” should only be as a last resort. Remember your host is trying to purchase food, beverages, favors and for todays kids events it usually means they are paying per head for your child to attend, and they are just trying to make sure your child gets to participate and they receive they favor or activity. Just remember other parents understand your pain, communication is the key, I am often told, “if they would just give me some clue if it’s a yes or no”, or “i’d rather have an extra _________ if i know they may come”. So parents text, call, email. or even send a note with your child, but please, please communicate!